Mother’s Day

(It doesn't take much to make me happy. But scotch helps)

By Katy England

Mother’s Day means different things to different people.  And what you want to do for mother’s day is going to vary – sometimes by year, sometimes by the second.

It’s hard, because the amount of time I want to spend around my kids depends greatly on things largely outside of my control. Like how much they are or are not screaming at that very moment. Just yesterday, I went from wanting to bask in their awesomeness to pretty much wanting to run into the hills and hide, while drinking hard spirits in the space of about an hour. And then back to wanting hugs.

Some of my mom friends want nothing to do with their kids in Mother’s Day. They want to sleep in, be taken out to a dinner they haven’t had a hand in, and hang out with friends and dance the night away. I have wanted similar things – and from day to day still want those things.

The thought of sleeping in – not just not having to get up, but actually having the ability to sleep past 6 a.m. with no thoughts to who is yelling at who; no consideration for what accident of a potty nature has occurred in the night; no thought spared to lost stuffed bears (that are usually under a pillow or swallowed up by a blanket). That would be amazing. And also oddly dispiriting – which I know is insane. But there’s something about being a goddess of laundry, cooking and finder-of-lost-buddies that is addicting. I mean, most of us are muddling through life looking to feel important. You know what makes you feel special? Getting a full-body tackle-hug for finding a stuffed penguin, followed by a “Tank you, mama!”

There are times I want to very much not have any mom duties. But then there are certain mom duties I didn’t know I could live without. Like sing-a-longs with the girls or story time or ALL THE HUGS! And with all the craziness, all the stress, and tears comes the laughs, love, and awesomeness. You can’t have one without the other. And it makes you happy that you had good examples in your life – cause not everyone does. My mom, and my husband’s mom are inspirations. My sister-in-law and her four kids blows my mind with how she is such an awesome, funny mom. The kind of mom I want to be.

So, my Mother’s Day is going to spent hanging out with the kids, letting them eat off my plate (I’m a terrible influence on children and dogs). We’ll probably watch too much TV and I’m not going to clean the house – well, I might do some survival dishes.  We will eat greasy take-out (Crosby’s – we’re coming for you!) and indulge in thick milkshakes. I’ll sing a billion silly songs of dubious taste. After bedtime, I’ll have some scotch and eat some Lofthouse Cookies.  And I’m going to love it (even if there is yelling).

Enjoy the enjoyable

Savoring the little things while they're little

By Katy England

There will always be something that is frustrating going on in your life – especially if you have kids. Because if it’s not happening to you, it’s happening to them. They will fight, whine, hit, sulk, get sick, be nosy, break things, have accidents and more. And if they aren’t, you are – be it a vehicle breaking, unexpected bills, needing to get work done, needing a break – the list of things to get stressed about is literally endless. You can drive yourself nuts – I have.

Which is why it’s important to make note of some of the nice things that go on in your life. Especially when it is passing so very quickly before our eyes.

The kids have always like the bus – the ritual of waiting for the bus has been filled with excitement since day-one. Pictures of the kids with grins lighting up their faces the first time the bus arrived is enough to lift me from a dark funk. If only we could all be so excited about our daily routine, right?

And since those first few days of clapping, and squealing with delight, things have evened out.  There is play, there is a bit of bickering – you know normal level stuff. But always enthusiasm when the bus arrives.

Lately though there was a change – right as the bus rolls up, all of the kids want to give mom and dad hugs and kisses. Which is something I love – I mean who wouldn’t right? So, I know it sounds like bragging – but hold on, it’s less bragging and more record keeping. Because here we are, in 2016 with walking, talking, mostly potty-trained human being who five years ago didn’t exist. And then they were babies and then toddlers and now they’re mini people.

And I don’t want to wax too sentimental, but I know that I won’t always be getting these hugs. I know that there will come a time when waiting for the bus becomes a chore (I remember waiting for a bus, my memory problems don’t go that deep). I just want to remember these things. I want to remember brushing their thistledown hair, and their full-on body-slam hugs when I pick them up. I want to remember the dance parties/exercise romps we have pre-bedtime. I want to wrap them up and put them in a box, because that’s as close as I can come to getting them to slow the heck down when it comes to growing up.

My son can already count to 18 and knows that’s when he becomes a grown up (let’s not spoil that little illusion). He also loves dragons and dinosaurs and Vikings. He was so excited about Smaug being able to talk, which was only trumped by his excitement about how people were able to kill Smaug – and you should hear him pronounce Smaug – it’s amazing.

And the girls hug each other. They will exclaim how they miss the other one if they aren’t in the same room. They will say goodnight (even after they have gone to the potty nigh on a dozen times after bedtime) and it never gets old.

Recently, after months and months of telling me not to sing, the girls are making requests. Requests! I could die.

And I know this is a screed of sentimental crap. But I need it to exist – because like the thistledown hair, and the hugs, and the raucous laughter – it might be gone, but I never, ever want to forget it. So I write it down – and it will go in my little box of memories.